What Philly sports has taught me about myself

Don't worry--there will not be any "Werth" puns in this entry.

The state of Philly professional sports over the past couple of weeks has given me something to reflect on, and I take this next entry to humble myself before you and admit that my "adamant" opinions on certain things (namely, sports) are much more pliable than they may seem. Here is what I have found. . .

1. I don't "really" draw the line at killing dogs. Nobody was more disappointed than I (except maybe local ASPCA members) at Eagles signing of Michael Vick two off-seasons ago. I hated talking about it (but did so anyway), but when I did, I explained that, after committing the horrible atrocities Vick was sentenced to jail for, a man should not be given a second chance at being a multi-million dollar role model. I believed he served his time for what he did, but he wasted the one and only opportunity to be a national role model the way a star QB is. I barked (pun intended) when he was put in plays last season, and it broke my heart when Reid announced that Vick would be the starter this season. But at the end of the day, he's playing a hell of a quarterback, and I've been an Eagles fan for too long to care if he tortured and killed dogs after every snap. I'm not a Vick fan, but I am an Eagles fan, and despite my attempts to turn my back on the team that did this to him, I just cannot. I do not think Vick redeemed himself as a person by being a great QB (I heard such a notion on talk radio), but I can support him as a QB while he is playing so well. So no, I don't draw the line at torturing and killing dogs, as ungodly evil as that is. Would I still be a Steelers fan if Roethesburger was convicted of raping a girl? I don't know. What if I were a Ravens fan and Ray Lewis was convicted of killing a man? I can honestly say I do not know. I thought I was better than that. I thought my principles were stronger at the beginning of this offseason. Turns out. . . I just want my team to win a Superbowl.

2. $127 million is a lot of money. I don't see myself ever making such a sum, and I like to pretend that if I were to make anything remotely close to that, I would turn it down, knowing that such an income would make me jaded and spoil the thrill of living life. After all, some of my favorite of life's moments were moments when something as small as a banana made my day. I do believe that the more money you have, the value of many great things will decrease accordingly. Regardless, I'm pretty positive that I would do anything that didn't compromise those that I love if I were offered that obnoxious sum of money. Well, like what? Anyone who knows me knows that I am a very dedicated (and "dedicated" might be a nice word) Phillies fan. But if someone offered me $127 million over 7 years just to cheer for the Nationals, I can't see me turning that down, even if I know they will come in last place every year. AND I DON'T EVEN WANT THE MONEY. Now if a ballplayer (especially one who DOES want the money) was offered that to cheer (and play) for a losing team, can you honestly blame him? I'm sure if he had his "druthers," he'd like to win a little bit too, but as Marlon Brando might say if he didn't want to get noticed on the street, "They made him an offer he couldn't turn down."

3. I honestly don't care about hockey until the playoffs are on. I've been watching the Sixers a lot more than the Flyers, and the Sixers honestly suck. The Flyers are in first place, and the Sixers have no idea how to win a basketball game--their five "wins" seemed to have come by accident. Last season, as I watched the hockey playoffs, I told myself I would make a legitimate attempt to watch the hometown team during the season. But alas, every time somebody talks about the Flyers, I regurgitate what I read on the Philly Inquirer headlines and then nod my head like a Richard Nixon bobble-head doll (slightly modeled after an exaggerated version of the way he moved his own head). So to all those Phillies front-runners that I secretly get angry with during the playoffs, I'm sorry. I'm one of you. At least I can take solace in the fact that I only know like 3 or 4 actual Flyers fans anyway, and none of you hold a candle to my Phillies obsession, bitchazzz! (Yes, I'm actually bragging about a very unhealthy obsession).

Anyway, I'll stop there for now. Feel free to share your own sentiments (even humbling ones) and experiences.